Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Weighty Matters

Wondering how my *superficial* outfit ties into my post title?
I promise I'll get to that in a minute.

So, on Monday I decided to spend the Civic Holiday shopping in the morning while S had some things to finish for work [yes, even on Holidays he insists on working]. As I was heading out one of the stores, I walked by two guys standing by the escalator. As I walked by, I heard one of them quietly say, "go eat something". LOL, somehow I don't think he was offering to take me to dinner.

Growing up I've dealt with judging stares, been rumoured to be anoxeric or bulimic or both. Having to wear a uniform for most of my school years, meant having to wear a skirt or kilt, which meant exposing my skinny legs. Thankfully in high school I had the option to wear pants - and so I did. I would've worn a monkey suit, anything so long as I could hide them.

Then one day it hit me, small as they may be, I've used them to dance, run track, jump in cheerleading and most of all walk. I realized that as much as the hurtful words stung, I had much to be grateful for. As I got older, I accepted that my body was destined to be as curvy as that of a 12yr old boy's. That my legs are *slightly* bigger than toothpicks but nevertheless, they are a part of me.
I learned to deal with the rumours and the gawking. I've embraced that I have a super fast metabolism, that as much as S weighs twice what I do, I can eat as much as him on any given day and when I'm really hungry can outeat him no problem.

But then I hear comments like "go eat something" and for a moment I want to revert to hiding all over again. I am far from perfect but am certainly not one to belittle someone because of their looks. No matter where someone fell on the scale, I would never tell them to "go eat" or on the flip side "stop eating". And if someone I knew had an eating disorder, rest assured I would certainly approach the subject with more sensitivity.

When S and I met up for lunch (all you can eat sushi - and trust me, I got my money's worth) to spend the rest of the day together, I couldn't help but mention to him what had happened. He was litterally in disbelief and could only muster "WHAT???"

As we drove home in the evening, he turned to me, stared at my frayed jeans and spotted some pale skin and simply said, "he should've just said 'go get a tan'". He made me laugh and certainly put things in perspective. No, not that I need a tan(though it wouldn't hurt, LOL) but that those words were just as insignificant.

To top it off, S threw in, "by the way...I love the sexy zippers on your shoes."

Gotta love him.


I'm looking forward to catching up with your blogs today :)
xx Ela

Knit Blazer - Theory, "Love" Tee - AE, Purse - Vintage Chanel,
Skinnies - Vigoss from Saks, Sandals - Jessica Simpson available here

68 comments:

  1. Wow...don't listen to those guys!! YOu know how many girls would kill for your body?!? I would love to be as skinny as you :( I have short legs and a big bum...Not typical for an Asian so I always felt awkward. But I am starting to love my body more and more. Husbands help huh?? ;) Anyway, I love your casual but sexy outfit! And your bag is to die for!!! Thanks for your comments on my blog Ela!
    clothedmuch.blogspot.com

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  2. beautifully said {and written, lol}. Your legs are perfect and so are you! Never let anyone tell you otherwise...your hubs is one fab guy :) you look great, those are fantastic shoes! Enjoy your skinny legs, full belly of sushi, tanless color, and perfect zippers :) all I see in that is beauty!

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  3. May I just say, you look fabulous. I just chopped off my locks (which I've always worn long) to about your length, and your bob is such an inspiration. And those shoes! I want.

    Cheers.

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  4. Yay to your hubs. Those guys are dumb. You have fab legs.

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  5. Aww, the hubby was really sweet with his response and he is right, they are silly and you are gorgeous! Never forget it. XO. Yay for JS shoes, those are the best and you look lovely!

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  6. Girl, I know what you mean about women and their bodies. We can be critical of ourselves but it's important to remember we are all different and that in no way is a bad thing! (If you haven't already, read the post I wrote about women and their weight, I think I may have even titled it the same thing as you! Great minds think alike, eh?) Anyway, you are gorgeous and sexy, kudos to your BF for standing up for you!

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  7. You've got a keeper there! And I think it's I think your self confidence is inspiring.

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  8. i am like you! If my metabolism is normal - i will probably be overweight now. You look so pretty! this is my fave look

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  9. you'e pretty! love the vintage chanel!

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  10. I love your outfit, top to bottom and the bag. :)
    Secondly, darling, you should never ever listen (or believe, or take seriously) such a comment! That guy was rude and stupid, probably quite a few lbs overweight. And you are such a beautiful petite girl. Millions of women would kill to have a figure like yours!!!

    Have a wonderful day!

    x

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  11. Beautiful shots here Ela! I love them. Love your bag (OMG I wish I could afford CC) and seriously, your heels by JS...(She has a darn good design team) Love em!

    xo,
    Jessica

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  12. WOW. The nerve of those guys just really pisses me off. People have NO right to just spew 'advice' and 'tips' without knowing who you are and where you're coming from! UGH.

    Hehe, at least your boyfriend knows what to say. loool.

    Be sure and pop by & leave a note! :)

    -Laila
    www.randomweavings.blogspot.com

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  13. Seems like you are happy and healthy and that's all the matters.

    I used to eat as much as my hubby, who is a giant compared to me. But now I think getting older means I don't metabolise like I used to so I put on a bit of weight if I'm not careful. It was great though when I stayed tiny despite everything I ate.

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  14. Wow that is such a sad story to hear! Those guys are jerks... It's insane to think that people still have the nerve to comment on people's weight or whatever when people that really are sick w/ eating disorders are out there and more than ever... I am glad you were able to brush it off and enjoy your sushi too!

    Love the outfit btw :)

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  15. S sounds like an amazing person, you're lucky to have him.anyway, i know it's hard when people make comments about the way you look.i used to be very skinny, i think i'm ok now.but i eat.it's not my problem that i eat lots of chocolate and food[recently it turned to fast-food, which is not ok] but i keep having the same weight.have a nice day:)

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  16. awww.. :( that's a sad story. being judged as an anorexic and bulimic isn't that great.. :( those guys are sooo damnnnnn nasty! rrrrrr.. i hate people like that! :((

    btw, i love your heels so damn much! :) the outfit is great.. pretty on you!

    xx

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  17. Hi Ela,

    I missed Ur comment, lovely lady... U are so really pretty as always and I'm a huge fan vintage Chanel bag and Urs is awesome!

    X♥X♥

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  18. I'm so glad that S was there for you. And I would laugh about the tan, too :D Anyway, this was a good post. Never judge people by their looks. It's hard, but very important.
    p.s. I love your zipper shoes :-)

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  19. Oh Ela, I'm sorry you got a comment like that from an idiot. It's odd how there's always a big deal about oversized women, but so few realize that if you happen to be skinny, you get just as much criticism. People just assume you have an eating disorder or exercise like a maniac. I've had friends with the same problem and while I do know one who actually faints from lack of food, most of the gals I know just have a fast metabolism like you. In any case, I think you look fab, and those shoes are hot! What is it with guys and zippers on shoes by the way? I have a pair with a zipper at the back and my husband keeps asking me to wear them.

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  20. I really love this outfit, the exposed zip mixed with a chanel bag is stunning!
    I know it's tough when you get those sort of comments, but honestly you look lovely!
    Dazzle ME

    xo xo

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  21. great shoes and that vintage Chanel :)

    iyam
    www.styleandbeyond.blogspot.com

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  22. you look amazing just the way you are...esp in this outfit!

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  23. I can't believe those are J.Simp shoes! Whoever her designer is is doing a bang up job recently. So glad she branched out from her Daisy Duke inspired line when she first started.

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  24. You are gorgeous, and those guys were incredibly rude! Just remember, it's his issue, not yours. And don't let haters get you down. I love your blog! Don't quit!

    Super loving the beat up jeans and zippered kicks.

    Thanks for the nail polish recommendation! I'll let you know how it works out if I can find it. :)

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  25. Gasp! I can't believe that people say such hurtful things! Cath and I both have fast metabolisms like you (though I think mine is slowing down), and I hate when people talk about how teeny we are.

    You always looks gorgeous, Ela! I say eat it up (literally and figuratively). Those "haters" are saying things that reflect how they feel about themselves and not about how and who you are.

    ps- I looooove those shoes! The people Jessica Simpson works with are good!

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  26. That's horrible! You're absolutely beautiful the way you are (sorry that sounded really cheesy) and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Trust us, you look great :)

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  27. You look soooooo gorgeous, darling!

    xoxox,
    CC

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  28. Ohhh Elly Welly! Some people never grow up! You are so inspiring...I love how you weaved your words in with your fabulous outfit pictures. I am so sorry you encountered a dbag but you look great, feel great and have a great attitude...and a great husband! AND some GREAT SHOES!!!!

    So glad we are friends too!! You are ahhmazing! XO

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  29. first off, those guys know nothing and probably were greasy beer gutted fools - you are stunning and dont have anything to change!! also look at your amazing outfit, i love it from head to toe! blazer, bag, and esp. shoes are my fave (that added zipper in the back is SUCH a good feature).

    S is such a sweetheart, glad he can be a real man and make you smile :D

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  30. simply and chic look, i like it

    http://stylewaves.blogspot.com

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  31. You don't have to change at all--you look gorgeous!!! P.S can I have your jeans?? :-)

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  32. hey! thanks for the sweet comment! and thanks for following!

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  33. oh this is such a touchy subject! and you described it so well. more sensitivity would benefit us ALL!!! you are a beautiful and sweet and talented woman, and you i hope you can dismiss these stupid comments that are directed at you.

    i get the "she's a big girl" comments, and i kind of hate that. we all are what we are for the most part, and if we aren't hurting anybody why should it matter?

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  34. thanks for sharing so openly. i think we always have an idea that what we don't have is better when really we need to celebrate who we are (definately something I struggle with doing). You look amazing as always! and i totally almost bought those shoes last weekend!

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  35. ok im going to bond with you for a moment or at least im going to bond with what you wrote haha
    my best friend has had the same problem for as long as i have known her. she would get accused of being anorexic and people would also go and tell her to eat something. Funny thing is- just like you- should could out eat ANYONE and she does. shes always hungry. During high school she would do all sorts of things to try and gain weight but finally her body is the way it is and shes beautiful. she has always been but beauty is also finally accepting oneself and being comfortable- and i think you are definitly there. you look wonderful.

    side note; your hair looks especially great today!

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  36. Don't even listen to those guys, you look fabulous!And I love the zippers of your shoes too :)

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  37. You look healthy to me! Love those zipper shoes. Fabulous!

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  38. Awww, my boyfriend is just the same. He believes work can't wait not even on holidays. Your outfit is ultra cute! Adore your shoes. I also was picked on when I was young but it was because I was a little chubby, I wasn't fat though but just not as skinny as the rest, and I can understand how it hurts and yeah, how annoying it gets also.

    xo
    Sophie

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  39. Hi! Wow! I loveddd! You look great!
    . The bag is amazing.

    Have a good week.

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  40. Love your outfit! You've inspired me to wear my black blazer :)

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  41. Ah yes, the "too skinny" saga! I was once called to a counselors office in the 10th grade for my "easting disorder". Lawd! I have the same, exact problem! And people say the same terrible, silly and sometimes hurtful things to me too!

    However, I never listen to crazy people, and I am sure you don't either! You are so adorable and your husband sounds like a wonderful guy!

    Cheers, Ela!

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  42. =) love when I find canadian blogs .....
    and I get the whole "too skinny" thing all the time...you know, that can actually cause eating disorders...people put it into my head I needed to eat and eat when I was younger that I started taking pills to get me fatter.,.when really...its just my body and all the women in my family are this way.....
    just be yourself and eat healthy...
    screw the nutbags...
    ;)

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  43. don't listen to those guys. as long as you are living a healthy lifestyle and is healthy that is all that matter. my friends are forever calling me skinny and telling me to gain weight too.

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  44. You look amazing!

    It's so ridiculous how people feel they have the right to comment on someone like that. Ugh, I hate it.

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  45. lol go get a tan!! they always know what to say

    i went thoug most of my life with the same thing... people would say "your so skinny" and it hurt... but a friend gave me the best reply "you gonna donate?" and from then on i didnt care

    i love the post it was uplifting

    btw love the zipper... S has good taste

    XX
    Vi from Cali

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  46. I love everything from this outfit! The blazer, the jeans, and of course, the shoes! You are gorgeous as always love! XOXO

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  47. I would kill for skinny legs!!! You are gorgeous and don't let anyone make you feel any less than that.

    And, PS, zippers on shoes = so sexy.

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  48. Hi darling! You look so fab! Absolutely great!

    FM~FP~AF

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  49. I have dealt with the same thing my whole life... I am also pretty tall (almost 5'9) so I look even more stick like. But, DONT LISTEN for a second! You look amazing! I am always in awe of how you throw together an outfit and pull it off like a true super model. And S is wildly in love with you, and who else reallly matters?!?

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  50. I think that whole situation is very weird. I would LOVE to have your body. It is what supermodels and ballerinas dream of. Lol. Especially now that I know you can eat whatever you want and stay that way. I'm super envious!
    You look amazing and those guys were probably just jealous because their girlfriends are hippos or something. ;)

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  51. Omg, my kingdom for those shoes!!!

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  52. You look gorgeous as ever, girly. Blazer and the shoes! Lovely.

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  53. U look stunning ..

    joliiiees:-)

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  54. I think you look great. I wish people would leave others alone. My problem is not being too skinny, but needing to lose some weight. It is upsetting to have others make comments about your weight at times. We should love the bodies we've been given and respect others for their bodies as well. Take care. Don't let this get you down.

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  55. I happen to have a stick thin frame, which has always received rather harsh comments from other guys and a remarkable number of girls too. But I think it's all character building, and I no longer get angry or annoyed by it. Still I find it odd how people can be so blunt about somebody being thin, but would never dream of mentioning the weight of someone on the more rotund side of life. Meh, it's good to individual, and to love the body you have! And oh my, those jeans look fantastic, and I loooove your shoes. Hope you're having a beautiful day :)

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  56. What a mean thing to say! I'm glad you are comfortable with your body and I think you look great!

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  57. What??? Those guys deserve a hard kick on the you know what! (I'm dangerous like that! hehe*) Your S is a keeper darling... ps; love the detail on those heels!

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  58. I love this. People forget that it goes both ways. Props for putting this out there- I think you look FABULOUS.

    I mean, how could you not, with those shoes? ;-)

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  59. Hi, Ela!

    Just wanna say that S was so sweet and he's definitely a keeper.:)

    I wonder why people are so rude sometimes. You should be proud of what you've got, a lot of women would starve just to have your figure. ;)

    Loving your Chanel bag and those zipper heels. They're so sexy!

    Hope you're having a wonderful week. :)

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  60. lovely outfit and yes the zipper on the shoes are great! its terrible being made fun of when you're younger and still trying to figure who you are... but it great you learned how to embrace what you have :)

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  61. You are stunning!
    I guess just be thankful that they aren't calling u a heffer :)

    thanks for stopping by my blog!
    I will be back on urs for sure!

    xx

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  62. love what you wrote and boyfriends are always the best. they seem to know how to make you feel better! <3

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  63. gotta love S :) he's good in my books. hehehehe! and those guys? EXCUUUUUUUSEEEE YOU! GAHH!!! WHY why?? was that really necessary? sighhh... good for you though, EAT EAT EAT girl. eat like theres no tomorrow. you can probably out eat those guys anyway. i havn't had that happen to me but when i signed up for a gym membership the machine told me i was dangerously skinny. ummm yeahhh.. right.

    you are beautiful just the way you are ms ela :)

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  64. i think you are gorgeous. People make comments all the time and it makes me sad how some people are just so fundamentally rude.

    love this outfit btw, you look so casually chic.

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  65. I am in heaven with this outfit. It is screaming my name! I love the zippers on the shoes and your bag is "oh my g-d" gorgeous!!

    Love the blog, so glad you blog, can't wait to see what else you come up with!

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  66. You look fabulous...ignore what they said. Those shoes are 2 die 4!!!

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  67. Hey beautiful,

    Wow, your blog post really struck something with me, so thanks for sharing. I'm 5'2" and a bit under 100 pounds and have dealt with several comments like these or snide ones covered up with a "just kidding." I am petite, yes, I am thin, but YEAH i can OUT EAT you, I work out, I have insecurities too, just like YOU. That it's harder to gain wait then you would think!

    But I have come to love my size and learned to ignore those comments.. i understand the sting when it comes up every now and then, but those people just wish they were you ;)

    Thanks again for sharing! You're awesome.

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Penny for your thoughts?
Hmm...let's make that an I.O.U ;)

xx Ela